Tag: Kendra Tillman

Bouncing Back from a Year of Grief and Loss :: Kendra Tillman

Posted on by Evangeline

Kendra and I met roughly ten years ago at an event for small business owners. We’ve remained connected as friends, sisters in Christ, and fellow life coaches over that time. It’s my pleasure to share her words of encouragement about bouncing back from grief and loss so that you benefit from her wisdom.

“Grief work: a process of confronting a life where you expect one thing and get another,
a life that brings you the unexpected and unanticipated.” ~ Edith Eger

The above quote is from clinical psychologist and a holocaust survivor, Edith Eger’s book, The Gift: 12 Life Lessons to Save Your Life. The Gift  is about the healing work necessary to be free from the prisons of the mind. The quote is in the chapter on unresolved grief and it’s her definition of grief work. 

Is there any better description of the last 12 months?

HOPE for 2021

Our hope of a new year was especially high for 2021, because grief and loss defined 2020 for so many. There were multiple battles we weren’t prepared to fight. Some loomed larger than others. Some lasted for days and others for months. 

Even still, we can be confident of this: God didn’t leave us helpless!

I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. Psalm 27:13,14

In His mercy we were given the secret weapon of resilience. Resilience is a determination to thrive despite what we’re going through. It keeps disappointment, anger, and exhaustion from derailing our best plans and is solidified through a life of dependence on God’s grace, His wisdom, His truth and His love. 

We weren’t promised a pressure-free life. In fact, resilience is built through the pressures of life. When life is weighing heavy on us, we need the power of the Holy Spirit to anchor our souls and renew our minds by setting, then forgetting and meditating.

Setting our minds on things above. Colossians 3:2

Bouncing Back

We need the power of the Holy Spirit to help us set our minds on a God who is greater than what we have faced, what we are facing and what we will face.

Forgetting things that are behind and stretching towards the prize of God’s high calling. Philippians 3:13

When we are seeking to renew our minds about our circumstances, depending on how traumatic the situation, we may wonder how can I forget what happened?  By “forgetting” I mean shifting our focus from what happened to the One who can help us release the guilt, shame and worry of our circumstances. 

We then move our attention to rehearsing or meditating in our minds what is possible by God’s grace. 

Meditating on things that are true, pure and of a good report are all the ways God encourages us to think right thoughts. Philippians 4:8

Set, Forget, Meditate

When we spend time setting, then forgetting, and then meditating on what God reveals about Himself and His promises, we take on the mind of Christ. A mind that is humble, confident, and assured of its purpose.

Journaling is an engaging method to set, forget, and meditate. 

In your journal, write the responses to the following:

What did you not anticipate happening last year that you must confront this year, in order to keep moving forward with peace and purpose? 

Set: What are one or two scripture promises that remind you of God’s faithfulness, regarding this loss?

Forget: If you’ve been tempted to let it define you or mentally punish yourself for a mistake connected to it, how will you release any guilt, shame or worry about it?

Meditate: Utilizing the scripture promises, write how you will respond to the pain when it tries to keep you stuck.

Bouncing back from a year of grief and loss requires us to confront the unexpected moments that left us wounded. The simple practice of set-forget-meditate can help us in this healing process.

Kendra Tillman Kendra Tillman is an executive leadership coach, a ministry leader, an author and podcaster. As the founder of StrongHer.me Coaching & Consulting, she provides strengths-based leadership training and digital content creation services for business and ministry leaders.

She hosts #WorkYourPlan with Kendra, a podcast centered on helping women reclaim their authentic voice and overcome fears (and other mental barriers) tempting them to second-guess their calling.

She is the author of You Are Stronger Than You Think: Lessons of Endurance in the Race of Faith as well as the STRONG Womanhood Growth Journal, a self directed guide for women who want to be active participants in their personal transformation.

When Kendra’s not working with women to achieve their most desired goals, her best days are spent with Daniel, her husband of 23 years and counting, and their three children and their dog in Gilbert, AZ.

 

Sometimes You Have to S-t-r-e-t-c-h Your Faith for Victory :: Guest Post

Posted on by Evangeline

In conjunction with the release of my book, Live To Win! 5 Essentials for Victory and Success, I’m excited to provide a series of guest posts over the next few weeks. These folks are special to me, having coached me in one way or another to achieve my career goals and experience victories at various times and in various areas of my life.

Today, I’m pleased to share with you the insights from my friend, Kendra Tillman. She encourages women who work from home to apply spiritual principles in order to grow their career. She helped me to stretch my faith and rely on God as I launched out as an author and speaker. Keeping the faith is a way of life that Kendra espouses no matter the challenge or difficulty.

When Victory Feels Out of Your Reach

Live to win - FaithI love to read Hebrews 11. Hebrews 11 chronicles what is referred to as the Faith Hall of Fame. It’s the Who’s Who of the faithful, the persistent, the imperfect, yet, still strong in faith. The lives of Noah, Abraham and Sarah and Moses are all detailed in the Old Testament. Hebrews 11 briefly shares their stories and the stories of several other ordinary men and women who wrestled with the same fears, insecurities and uncertainties we all face.

Do you know the one thing the Bible says all these men and women had in common? In Hebrews 11:13 we are told that “all these people died still believing what God had promised them. They did not receive what was promised, but they saw it all from a distance and welcomed it.” They all died…in faith. They were in faith that what God promised He would do. Yet, they died without seeing the promise fulfilled. In this chapter we are assured we are in good company, when we feel we haven’t received an answer to every prayer we’ve prayed.

Even though they didn’t see the promise fulfilled when they expected, they still believed.

How many days, weeks, months, years have passed since God has spoken a promise to your heart? Has the length of time caused you to waver in believing it will happen? I pray this post will stir your faith.

If we keep reading in Hebrews, God drops another nudge to our faith at the very beginning of Hebrews 12. “We are surrounded by a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith.” Have you ever been to a race? One of the best things about races is the crowd of family and friends that gather along the race route to cheer on the runners. They hold up signs. They yell encouragement. It’s wonderful!

Hebrews 12 tells us there’s a similar crowd that gathers for us in this race of faith that we run. These witnesses are not only the men and women mentioned in Hebrews 11, but all the men and women of faith who’ve lived since. They are waiting to see you cross the finish line. They are there to watch you win! The interesting thing is winning might look different than you expected.

No matter what you are facing today you are destined to win in the race of faith! Your victory may not look like mine and it may not even look like what you imagined, but you will win. I John 5:4 tells us that we receive victory through our faith. This is a promise from God’s word – our faith gives us the victory over the difficulties we experience in this world.

What promise from God seems distant or impossible for you? Surround yourself with people who want to see you win. Strengthen your faith by meditating on faith stories of men and women who persevered in faith. Stretch your faith beyond what feels possible.

 

Victory -Kendra TillmanKendra Tillman is the founder of StrongerThanYouThink.co, a growing movement that energizes working women with resources for making their personal, professional, and spiritual growth a priority. She is also the author of You’re Stronger than You Think.