Category: meditation

Bouncing Back from a Year of Grief and Loss :: Kendra Tillman

Posted on by Evangeline

Kendra and I met roughly ten years ago at an event for small business owners. We’ve remained connected as friends, sisters in Christ, and fellow life coaches over that time. It’s my pleasure to share her words of encouragement about bouncing back from grief and loss so that you benefit from her wisdom.

“Grief work: a process of confronting a life where you expect one thing and get another,
a life that brings you the unexpected and unanticipated.” ~ Edith Eger

The above quote is from clinical psychologist and a holocaust survivor, Edith Eger’s book, The Gift: 12 Life Lessons to Save Your Life. The Gift  is about the healing work necessary to be free from the prisons of the mind. The quote is in the chapter on unresolved grief and it’s her definition of grief work. 

Is there any better description of the last 12 months?

HOPE for 2021

Our hope of a new year was especially high for 2021, because grief and loss defined 2020 for so many. There were multiple battles we weren’t prepared to fight. Some loomed larger than others. Some lasted for days and others for months. 

Even still, we can be confident of this: God didn’t leave us helpless!

I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. Psalm 27:13,14

In His mercy we were given the secret weapon of resilience. Resilience is a determination to thrive despite what we’re going through. It keeps disappointment, anger, and exhaustion from derailing our best plans and is solidified through a life of dependence on God’s grace, His wisdom, His truth and His love. 

We weren’t promised a pressure-free life. In fact, resilience is built through the pressures of life. When life is weighing heavy on us, we need the power of the Holy Spirit to anchor our souls and renew our minds by setting, then forgetting and meditating.

Setting our minds on things above. Colossians 3:2

Bouncing Back

We need the power of the Holy Spirit to help us set our minds on a God who is greater than what we have faced, what we are facing and what we will face.

Forgetting things that are behind and stretching towards the prize of God’s high calling. Philippians 3:13

When we are seeking to renew our minds about our circumstances, depending on how traumatic the situation, we may wonder how can I forget what happened?  By “forgetting” I mean shifting our focus from what happened to the One who can help us release the guilt, shame and worry of our circumstances. 

We then move our attention to rehearsing or meditating in our minds what is possible by God’s grace. 

Meditating on things that are true, pure and of a good report are all the ways God encourages us to think right thoughts. Philippians 4:8

Set, Forget, Meditate

When we spend time setting, then forgetting, and then meditating on what God reveals about Himself and His promises, we take on the mind of Christ. A mind that is humble, confident, and assured of its purpose.

Journaling is an engaging method to set, forget, and meditate. 

In your journal, write the responses to the following:

What did you not anticipate happening last year that you must confront this year, in order to keep moving forward with peace and purpose? 

Set: What are one or two scripture promises that remind you of God’s faithfulness, regarding this loss?

Forget: If you’ve been tempted to let it define you or mentally punish yourself for a mistake connected to it, how will you release any guilt, shame or worry about it?

Meditate: Utilizing the scripture promises, write how you will respond to the pain when it tries to keep you stuck.

Bouncing back from a year of grief and loss requires us to confront the unexpected moments that left us wounded. The simple practice of set-forget-meditate can help us in this healing process.

Kendra Tillman Kendra Tillman is an executive leadership coach, a ministry leader, an author and podcaster. As the founder of StrongHer.me Coaching & Consulting, she provides strengths-based leadership training and digital content creation services for business and ministry leaders.

She hosts #WorkYourPlan with Kendra, a podcast centered on helping women reclaim their authentic voice and overcome fears (and other mental barriers) tempting them to second-guess their calling.

She is the author of You Are Stronger Than You Think: Lessons of Endurance in the Race of Faith as well as the STRONG Womanhood Growth Journal, a self directed guide for women who want to be active participants in their personal transformation.

When Kendra’s not working with women to achieve their most desired goals, her best days are spent with Daniel, her husband of 23 years and counting, and their three children and their dog in Gilbert, AZ.

 

Strike Out the Negative Thoughts So That You Live With More Hope and Power

Posted on by Evangeline

Kamilah Giraud - Thought StoppingIt’s my pleasure to provide a “rerun” of Kamilah Browning Giraud’s guest blog post from 2015. She shares with us how she used “thought stopping” to get through her mother’s illnesses as well as her own struggle with infertility/miscarriages. Kamilah made the decision that she could depend more on God’s Word than she did on the doctors’ diagnoses. I hope her words encourage you to use the “STRIKE” method to turn away your negative thoughts and live with the hope, positivity, and power that God’s Word brings!

Be sure to read the 2018 Update below! 🙂 

Strike ‘Em Out by Kamilah Giraud

How many times do you go through a day and have “random” thoughts that are completely unrelated to your job, or to the task at hand? I’m sure there are some statistics that give an average, but I can even share with you that in the few minutes it has taken me to sit down and share the first few sentences with you, I have already thought about; how cute my co-worker’s shirt is (as she walked by my door), whether or not I will eat the salad I brought to work, or go to the cafeteria (as my stomach growled), and I even thought about what color I should get my nails painted next (as I looked down at the keyboard while typing). Now as trivial and harmless as these “random” thoughts may be, they all still served the same purpose–taking my focus away from what it is I have set out to do.

TOXIC THOUGHTS

While some may perceive these “mental vacations” as healthy breaks, others might find them as nuisances. I tend to ignore them most of the time because if I gave those thoughts much thought, then I would not have time for anything else. This scenario can be a little entertaining, but what about more disturbing thoughts that sound like, “Why bother running, you’ll always be fat”, or “It’s too hard to save money and pay my bills, so I’m probably never going to buy a house.” And what about the thought that comes up that sounds like, “Why keep trying? It hasn’t happened yet. I am fooling myself.”?

These  less trivial, less mundane, and certainly less entertaining thoughts can so easily surface throughout the course of the day and yes… they too serve the same purpose of taking your focus off that which you have set out to do. So then what type of recourse do we have against these thoughts? Well a good friend of mine name Paul, (whom I have actually never met) was imprisoned and wrote some most amazing letters that reflected how in spite of being in a place of true suffering, we can still choose joy. Even though I never met my friend Paul, and although his letters might originally been written in about 62 A.D, you cannot tell me that he didn’t address me directly in his letters too!

Philippians 4:8  says, “And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”  Paul understood how these “random” thoughts can come to steal your peace. I can bet while he was imprisoned he had more than a few thoughts that popped up serving the sole purpose of stealing his focus off of spreading the gospel.

Paul said to fix your thoughts, which to me implies the need to replace “broken” thoughts. Broken thoughts are the ones that shatter your dreams, and distort your promises. Broken thoughts are lies from the enemy, and broken thoughts are contrary to the truth. So let’s do what my friend Paul urges. Let’s fix those broken thoughts by using thought-stopping, or what I call the STRIKE method.

S.T.R.I.K.E. Method

Stop the Thought
Replace it with God’s Word
Imagine what it looks like
Keep seeing it
Embrace the truth

As the broken thoughts begin to surface you can stop the thought. Many times that is an internal stop, but I have had to audibly say “Stop” in order to refrain from repeating the broken thought in my head.

As soon as you “stop the thought”, you need to replace it with God’s Word. Replace it with the truth–those thoughts that are honorable, right and pure. Replace it by thinking of things that are excellent and worthy of praise.

As you think on those things, imagine it and see yourself in the manifestation of it.

Keep visualizing the thoughts and keep seeing it. This is a faith walk, and we cannot be moved by what we see in the natural, so allow yourself to keep seeing through the eyes of Christ, and know that He sees His promises.

Embrace the truth! God’s word is true. As believers, we are not exempt from the suffering that’s inherent to human existence, but the good news is our faith gives us a different and hopeful perspective that is based on the truth. God is forever faithful and the truth is that He has plans for you to prosper and not to harm you. He has plans to give you hope and a future. That is the truth and you can embrace it.

S.T.R.I.K.E. out your negative thoughts: Stop the Thought. Replace it with God’s Word. Imagine what it looks like. Keep seeing it. Embrace the truth. Share on X

Our thoughts may or may not respond to 3 STRIKES and be “out”, but if the negative thought comes to bat again, just as sure as a pitcher’s form and speed improves with practice, yours can too. All you need to do is throw another STRIKE.

Thought Stopping - Philippians 4:8

 

2018 UPDATE:

Kamilah is an overcomer! She consistently replaced the negative thoughts with Word-based positive thoughts. She meditated on the best, not the worst. Knowing that the power of life and death were in the words she spoke, she made her conversations align with God’s promises (Proverbs 18:21). Kamilah acknowledged that her miracle was in God’s hands AND her mouth!

She is now the mother of a beautiful baby girl! 

Monday’s Marinade

Posted on by Evangeline

Monday’s Marinade is provided to you as a means of “soaking yourself” in the hope-filled Word of God at the beginning of your week. Start your week by meditating on this Word. Repeatedly think about and quietly say it to yourself.  Marinate and season your week with hope and a confident expectation of good things happening!

Here’s your spiritual marinade for this week:

Monday Marinade - prov. 163.jpg

Successful Like a Cow

Posted on by Evangeline

“Meditation” is defined as contemplation, reflection, rumination and spiritual introspection (Source: Dictionary.com). Most people relate this word with TM, Transcendental Meditation, a “new age” technique based on Hindu writings. But did you know that there is a biblical form of mediation?

Joshua 1:8 gives us great insight into what biblical meditation is and how it differs from TM or any other type of meditation.

“Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.” (NIV)

In this verse, God is instructing Joshua about how to succeed as the new leader of Israel. But we can also glean from this scripture about how to be successful in life today, especially as we look forward to the new year. “Meditate” here means to ruminate, to speak (utter sound), to imagine, to speak with oneself (muttering) in a low voice (whisper). It is not simply reading the Word, thinking about it for a brief moment and quickly forgetting it. Biblical meditation involves using your voice to affirm God’s Word for your life and is an action you take frequently throughout the day.

But God didn’t tell Joshua to say anything and everything that came to his mind. He instructed him to meditate on the Book of the Law. God wanted Joshua to read, think about, and mutter God’s words! He wanted Joshua ruminate the good things about God and His love for him and the people of Israel.

Image courtesy of Sura Nualpradid / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Image courtesy of Sura Nualpradid / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Rumination usually brings to mind the picture of a cow chewing it’s cud. When a cow chews it’s cud, it is regurgitating the food it has eaten earlier, chewing it again, swallowing it, and then regurgitating again, chewing, and swallowing that same food repeatedly to gain the most value out of the food. We are to do the same in our meditation of God’s Word. To gain the most value from God’s words of life (John 6:63), we are to read His Word, speak His Word, think about that Word, and again speak His Word and think about His Word, repeatedly during our waking hours. I have found this can easily be done in snippets of 60 seconds here and there throughout our day.

For example, Psalm 1:3 tells us that the people who frequently meditate God”s Word “are like trees planted along the riverbank, bearing fruit each season. Their leaves never wither, and they prosper in all they do.” In meditating that particular verse, you can frequently whisper to yourself throughout the day, “I am like a tree planted near water, always bearing fruit at the right time, never unhealthy, always prospering.” Change the words if you like, but think and speak about how God loves you and firmly establishes you for success through His Word in every area of your life. There’s something in the Word of God that is the solution for our every problem and need! Speaking God’s Word is one of the keys to unlocking and unleashing it’s problem-solving power.

To become more diligent at doing meditating, I set the alarm on my phone to go off at a specific time every day, Sunday-Saturday, to remind me to take just 60 seconds, right at that moment, to meditate on God’s Word or to pray in the spirit. I can’t tell you the level of peace I’ve begun to experience and the insights for my life that I’ve gained just my incorporating this quick habit into my day. It has made a huge difference in how I view God’s love for me and His work on my behalf.

I’m considering providing a program that helps you understand, establish, and gain the most from this habit of 60-second biblical meditation. Would you like to become more like a cow, getting the most value out of God’s Word by incorporating this habit of success into your day? Let me know below.